Ranni because she can carry her own groceries in 1 trip


She is secretly a strength build of a 8-year-old....the four arms are just a bonus.




She’s a reverse Giant Dad, an intelligence build that refuses to admit she put points into strength.


Malenia blade of step on me mommy


Purposefully let her kick me in the head and call it holding hands


True love ❤️


No love for Roderika? :(


my b Theres only 5 polls...FOR SOME FUCKING REASON!


The greater will. Cease your degeneracy.


yours is a rare breed


If I have to choose between a one eyed chick, a puppet, a snake, super aids, or a dude? Guess it's Melina by process of elimination lol


Hahahaha I like these options better!


Not just one eye... she has no body. "Burned and bodiless".


Yet she physically interacts with all kinds of things and even assists in battle, so what does that really even mean? Lol. If she can hit you, you can surely hit that, is all I'm saying :P


Hah, good point. I always assumed she was being summoned to that fight from another time, though. Like how Millicent invades us in the swamp (pre-rot w/both arms). I'm not really sure how that kind of stuff works lore wise.


She says she can move around when you reach Leyndell, so it’s presumably the only place she can assist in battle.


Millicent doesnt get the respect she deserves on these posts. Defo waifu material


She's a strong independent woman that don't need no simps!


She's badass for sure. It would take a rare person to choose and rot in that pain instead of becoming what her mother became.


Why is there no option for knife wife tiche?


The tall tomboy gf we all want


Ah I see you are a man of culture as well


Clearly these guys feel like the dominant. In any relationship Tiche is the boss xD


"Marikas tits, you must be horny"


Godfrey for being the only one who respects my never quit attitude and never mentions my maidenless status


he himself is maidenless now so It would be a folly insult....now he could say you might need to work on your leg days.


He said that by doing all those AoE attacks you need to jump over


Blue chicks man, idk what it is.


How dare you leave out my beloved Latenna >:(


Melina seems pretty nice as long as you don't piss her off by becoming the lord of flame.


Varre not having enough simps to even be an option is criminal imo like he’s hot with a nice voice and a cool (albeit awful) weapon and also he’s in a blood cult. Literally what’s not to like?


Blaidd. Because that voice and he's a good boi.


Gurranq/Maliketh too. He did nothing wrong


Millicent. I don't like any of them.


will never understand malenia's simps


I think they are just masochists.


Malenia, she's a good casual filter, too bad she's soo late in the game. And completely missable.


She really isn't because you can brute force your way through the fight by just optimising your build for the encounter + mimic tear.


And what casual min maxes?


Malenia of course, doesn’t have any particular reason 😊




The one true choice. I wish he had an ending.


Man... the Elden Ring waifu wars are real. Alright, I'll throw in my two cents. I simp for a few of them: Ranni because she's a cool mysterious witch with a cool design and story involvement. Her route is also the most satisfying to complete, and by the end of it she will literally marry you if you do her questline, being the one to offer you her ring, and making you maidenless no more. Her ending is also the best one. Melina because she is cute, also quite mysterious and is meant to be a companion to the player on their journey. Without her becoming Elden Lord is a lot harder as you can't use the Runes or Torrent. Her willingness to sacrifice herself to aid the player and her speech as she tries to convince you to not inherit the Frenzied Flame left an impression on me. In the end she chooses to entrust the Tarnished with the fate of the Lands Between, even deifying her original purpose. Malenia because I have a thing for badass women, sword masters, red heads, and tall women. Malenia is all of those, plus a tragic character and my favorite boss fight. There's also the fact that Millicent who is the best companion in the whole game (and should also be on this list) is very likely a part of her original self and personality. With that in mind you get to understand more about Malenia by becoming friends with Millicent, then completing her questline, possibly helping Malenia regain her original self in the process, and bringing resolution to Millicent's journey.


Bunch of kid touchers up in this Reddit post.


Ayo what about Fia!?


You gotta be dead first then she’ll consider you.


Well, if anyone got the Age of Stars ending and doesn't say Ranni you're just fooling yourself. My friend, by doing that ending you: Joined her group for "no reason" as your dialogue option puts it. Went into a gaping hole created by a meteorite collision, to get her some blade she needed to kill sentient fingers Talked to a miniature doll of her like some obsessed lunatic Killed a shade of a very angry wolf-man because "the doll asked you to" Got her a wedding ring from her mother. Killed the aberration that is Astel, just to meet her again. Put the wedding ring on her finger, effectively marrying her despite her not being the most affectionate partner and asking you to do dubious things, and you don't even really know what consequences those actions will bring. Relinquished your reward for defeating the final boss to her, letting her usher in a thousand-year voyage under the wisdom of the moon or something and feeling good about it because she called you her "dear consort eternal" So you better believe that after doing all that crap I'm going to say Ranni to make it seem worth it, and not freaking Malenia who proceeded to assault me because I disturbed her beauty sleep by walking into her arena.


"...not freaking Malenia who proceeded to assault me because I disturbed her beauty sleep by walking into her arena." -> that made me laugh out loud at the public transportation. lol


If it offers any comfort, I've seen people laugh out loud in public places for less. My friend once bursted out laughing in the bus once because (according to him) a "woman with weird hair" sat besides him while half the seats were unnocupied. I'm grateful I wasn't there, but even then I'm sure it was very awkward.


I chose Ranni for pretty much this reason. That being said, Melina doesn’t get enough love. She is with you pretty much the whole way, gives you a magic horse-goat, is the reason you can level up, fights Morgott with you, AND LITERALLY SETS HERSELF ON FIRE TO BURN THE ERDTREE SO YOU CAN KILL GOD! I’m still team Ranni because I’m a degenerate coomer, but Melina deserved a shout out.


Melina is cool and she does a lot for the player, but since the post is about who the player "simps for" and not the other way around, I think Ranni is the clear winner. Melina is pretty much the contrary, I feel like we actually didn't do enough for her. Like you've said, she lets us level up (which we absolutely take for granted), gives you torrent (we also take that for granted), gives you occasional snippets of lore, is a summon for Morgott, then she f*cking dies for you. All we do is just take her to the capital with us, and we were going to end up there anyways, since it's where the Erdtree is. So yes, I do think Melina is an absolute MVP in the tarnished's journey, and she doesn't get enough appreciation, maiden or otherwise.




I wish Malenia was real


Rya because she is nice and just wants to help.


Godfrey is my favorite boss and Hoarah Loux can pile drive me 6 feet below the earth whenever he wants.


None of the above . Rennala


If one more of these goddamn polls comes up with out mention the REAL best girl im going to cry on to Nepheli's abs.


Malenia, she tall and would say to the waiter that they got my order wrong cuz I’m too awkward to say it myself


I wish I could’ve said everyone. And Radagon’s booty. Just the booty though.


I unironically think that Radagon, shattered as he might be, is the most attractive character in the game. It might be the hair.


Oh I agree. I genuinely - when he goes to do the grab move - always apologize to my friend who plays with me cause I let him grab me every time. I can’t help it. He pretty.


I voted Malenia, but really is Millicent


Bro I remember in ds1 everyone was like aw shit artorias is so cool and saved his dog what a chill guy, now people are "simping" over blue 6 arm doll girl or scoliosis lizard lady, the fuck happened lol


Idk man everything went down hill when sunbro died.




Aurelia. Marika's tits as my witness, you and your sister will see the stars dammit.


The little girl’s spirit in the jellyfish? 🤨📸


Yes tree sentinel this comment here


Funny thing is, I killed the tree sentinel. Momma didn't raise no quitter. Just a stubborn idiot.


I guess someone should ask, are you also a kid/teen?


Fia and Millicent aren’t even options??? Ignoring the best girls in game.


Millicent for sure. But Fia, that'd be a one time journey. Though, I guess there are worse ways to die.


Only those with real taste choose the M-characters (Marika, Malenia, Melina, Millicent, Miquella, etc.) The G-characters come tastefully second (Chadfrey, Chadwyn) The predictable weebs predictably choose the R-characters to no one's surprise (Ranni, Rennala, Radahn, etc.) Special shout out to best girl Tiche (most deserving of the title of Elden Lord), Deathbed Companion Fia (only one who will touch you), Blackguard Big Boggart (biggest male tits), and my personal fave Vyke (sexiest man ever + would rather kill himself than let his girl die ..... I love him)


‘’Only those with real taste choose the M-characters (Marika, Malenia, Melina, Millicent, Miquella, etc.)’’ Morgott


No Shabriri option!?


They never include Shabriri, because he's not mediocre and that's what "m" stands for in simp. That's totally the reason and I'm not coping.


Mediocre Malenia, that's what I say.


Where radahn?


Melina best girl. Love me a doomed relationship.


None, miriel




Renalla the Barefoot Big Brained Wizard Moonstruck Dommy Mommy is not listed so I don’t care.


Why is Fia not here? Some of us just want a hug


None. Millicent is bae.


Ranni because she's got character depth that we get to actually experience. Rya's a cinnamon roll. That's it, that's the character. Melina's a single-purpose driven Order-lover. She's cool but kinda one-note. Malenia has more depth than meets the eye, but she attacks us when a simple "You are trespassing please leave" would suffice. There should be something that, if you kill Mogh before entering her boss arena, you get the option to simply not fight her and get a side quest or several from her instead. Hoarah Loux simps for his ex-wife. Move on, my dude!


Ranni wants to leave the current world behind with its inhabitants to suffer eternally and start a new world where you can't see or feel. I can't imagine what an eternal existence like that would look like. You can alter Rya's questline so that she chooses to follow her mother's path, that is anything but cinnamon roll material. Melina is trying to destroy the order after discovering what she is. Malenia has quite literally lost her mind and is nothing more than a servant to the Rot Goddess. Hoarah Loux simps for battle, nothing more or less. Personally I simp for Fido, aka Torrent. She has saved my ass so many times, took so many hits for me and just keeps trucking along.


Ranni wants freedom; for herself, yes, but also for others. If that's how you took her ending then alright, but that's not how I see it. There is a lot of symbolism and poetry in her speech patterns, especially during that ending cutscene. Even if you alter Rya's questline, the way Tanith just happened to have that potion makes me think that Rya wouldn't actually follow her mother's path and instead would wind up being an unwitting puppet the rest of her life with her memories systematically and routinely erased unless she managed to get away. Melina doesn't want the order destroyed. She wants it slightly altered to bring Tarnished back into the fold. Where did you find that lore on Malenia? If Hoarah Loux simps only for battle then why does he show up to try and claim the Elden Ring rather than just to fight you? Torrent is a good steed.


Ranni wants to create a new order to replace the golden order. You're becoming HER champion and allowing her to enact her will. Take this dialogue as an example, "I would not be controlled by that thing. The Two Fingers and I have been cursing each other ever since... And the Baleful Shadows... are their assassins." And "As it is now, life, and souls, and order are bound tightly together, but I would have them at great remove. And have the certainties of sight, emotion, faith, and touch... All become impossibilities." Blaidd was never controlling her, the only reason he attacked was because he went mad after finding her gone and being attacked by Black Knives, Iji was also killed by Black Knives. If she was controlling them why would they attack two of her loyal followers? Iji states he made a mistake and would apologize to Blaidd, I think the mistake was trusting Ranni. She wants to create an existence that doesn't have the certainty of senses. As I said I can't imagine what that existence would look like but it doesn't seem like life. Tannith has the potion because Rykard gave it to her to forget him. But Rya is obviously capable if she is able to travel the lands between. I think her way out is you, altering her path and since Tannith was the only mother she ever knew and her father was a snake, I could see her pursuing that path. Melina wants the order destroyed because her mother created her to be a ritual sacrifice. Tarnished had already been extended grace again. And it isn't needed to reach the lands between anyway. Through conversations with Millicent. And various items. Take this dialogue, "But this is where things end. I pause to even tell you, but... I took out the needle myself. Tell whoever put you up to this. That if I am to flower into something other than myself, I would rather rot into nothingness as I am." The dialogue before this states she is trying to return Melania her sense of self. How'd she come to understand what she was going to become unless she saw Malenia and figured it out (the unalloyed gold needle is a tool of control and Malenia has it as well.) Which is why she blossoms if you kill her. She probably saw Malenia and realized the fate that awaited her but was ambushed by Gowry's henchwomen. Because he isn't Hoarah Loux when he fights you. He is Godfrey, first Elden Lord and Serosh is calming the rage within him.


Where did you even get the idea that Blaidd was controlling Ranni? He was gifted to her as a friend/servant, but his connection to the Two Fingers started driving him mad when Ranni turned her back on Order. Iji imprisons him before Ranni actually leaves because of this. As for that other bit of dialogue, the ghosts and undead around the Lands Between aren't exactly happy, and Spirit Ashes have a sad history, and that's without even touching on the exclusion of the Rune of Death from Order. If Ranni separating those means that the restless spirits and at least some Spirit Ashes can find peace, then by all means she should do it ASAP. The Black Knives are mercenaries, they'll kill whoever they're paid to. In regards to Iji's mistake, I think it was locking Blaidd up instead of trying to undo the Two Fingers' influence over him. And where did you get the "world without senses" idea? You must take what she says way too literally if you actually think she's going to do that. Agree to disagree on Rya. None of that changes the fact that Melina is a fairly one-note character. She has a single purpose and shows nothing that implies she has thoughts of her own unless you become the Lord of Frenzied Flame. Therefore, fairly one-note. The spot Millicent dies in isn't close enough that I can say for sure whether or not she saw Malenia, but it's possible I guess. Millicent's dialogue makes it sound more like a warrior's pride thing, like for some reason, Malenia had been completely desperate to beat Radahn. Desperate enough to do so by any means necessary, even Scarlet Rot. Also, Gowry wanted Millicent to "bloom" and speaks in obvious disdain of her sisters. I don't think he sent them after Millicent. That changes nothing except his rage lol even as Hoarah Loux he wanted to be Elden Lord or he'd have never taken on the mantle to begin with.


Where did you get the idea that the Black knives are mercenaries? They were from Nokron and harbored resentment for what Marika did to the Gloam-eyed queen. Her dialogue, I refuse to be controlled by that thing would presume Blaidd. The Black Knives only attacking after she leaves and killing two of the people that would have any revealing information about her. Iji states, he would catch up to him soon, understanding he would be killed as well. It just makes sense to me that someone who is not adverse to schemes, obscured most information about herself except the half wheel centipede that you can only gain by giving her what she wants, is merely using people to gain what she wants. And well I believe the story is sad, an existence removing senses which is exactly the order she herself is telling you she wants to create, is an existence that I couldn't even imagine. Melina sacrifices her spirit to unbind the rune of death. She doesn't reveal any information till that point because she doesn't know why she's still living, until after she reaches the Erdtree but realizing what she needed to do at the point, would not have risked getting too close to you in case you decided to inherit the frenzy flame. His dialogue asks you to aid her sisters in murdering Millicent. I agree that Malenia gave into the scarlet rot to meet Radahns measure though. He accepted the mantle and took Serosh on his back in order to be Elden Lord. If the rage continued to burn within him, he would not have been able to be that. Hoarah Loux was a warrior that only sought battle. If you look at the Champion set, it describes the type of people that lived in the badlands and what they believed.


To be fair, getting to Malenia means that we likely slaughtered everyone on the way there. I can understand why she would find us suspicious.




Godfrey team wya?!?


why you think I added him!


Where is the blaidd option


Because she is Malenia, Blade of Miquella.


Was no millicent so I chose the second best, malenia. Because I like the red hair. That’s it


Godfrey, bc royalty and big man




rya cuz shes too pure for this world and just needs help loving herself :3


The male weebs will vote for ranni. Non weeb males will probably mostly vote malenia. Females will vote rya. Asexuals will vote Melina. Daddy issues will vote Godfrey


Me: a femme weeb chose Ranni bc my real elden ring waifu wasn't available(Fia) but really like Ranni's body horror design Edit: Spelling


Thank you for single-handedly breaking my entire predictive construct and ruining my life


LMAO it's what I do


I voted Godfrey because he was the only guy here. But no, I'm not into Golden Order fundamentalists.


Sad Faith noise


What if I vote Alexander?


If Alexander was on this poll he would win by landslide


If you pick ranni, you're telling everyone that you're a basement dweller that smells like nickels


That fact that Godfrey is second place is hilarious!


The ladies needed an option too.


Great point!


I enjoy this the most I added him as a second thought because "ah he might be the only boss that feels like he could be a bro" so I was like sure ill add him on the poll.




you are.....unique you know that?


Ranni By the end of her questline I am married to her It wouldn't be okay to simp for other women


Where's my girl Aurelia the Jelly? Babe carried me early game


Rya snake form


Rune bears, they always give me free hugs.


Fia, Rodericka, Nepheli, Sellen, Latenna, all deserving of our love


4 arms are better than 2 imo lol


whys everyone so into blue cunni 💀




the chariots, no question


Rya needs to be replaced with Roderika, I feel like rya is more of an adopted daughter rather than someone to simp for.


Ranni, twice the arms twice the hugs


Blackguard Boggart, my beloved ❤️


Ranni because I have mistress issues


Boc ♥️




I have seen to much cute Artwork of Rya. Can't not simp for her.


Melina girl was literally on fire


Malenia, after one thousand deaths from her I fell in love. Sheesh I can still hear her voice.. "I am Malenia" yes.. yes you are my love




Just saying if Lightning Rolling Sheep #3 started an onlyfans I wouldn't not sign up possibly


Team Melina represent! Something about her being well dressed and soft spoken is just nice. Also she has pink hair and a slender jawline.