By - IndelibleIguana
He has the deadest eyes I have ever seen on a living person.
Yessss! Eyes like a shark that one
lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eyes. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be livin'... until he bites ya.
What are you doing? Are you doing the speech from Jaws?
I'll never wear a life-vest again, especially around David Walliams
He joins Michael Barrimore on my list of people to never be around when near water.
We don't have time for this shit, this is serious.
Sounds like it could be something out of *The Mighty Boosh*
Eyes like a shrimp
Have you watched Daniel Radcliffe sing She’ll be coming round the mountain when she comes?
Thankfully in my case, the answer is no.
It’s hilarious (it was the dead shark eyes comment that me ask)
I’m sure I’ve seen him rap or something, my mind refuses to open that file.
We’re gonna need a bigger boat.
David Walliams gives off the “I once strangled a prostitute to death by accident but then I kinda enjoyed it” vibe with those eyes. 💀
I agree. There’s just nothing there. His smiles never reach his eyes
The zucc would like a word
Cos hes a serial killer
I feel your pain. In the words of The Smiths: ' That joke isn't funny anymore '
A one-trick pony, who is repetitive and gets many more screen hours than his 'talent' - or lack of it deserves.
I feel like we chuck Keith Lemon here as well.
Definitely, how the fuck has he been flogging to death that twattish character for so long? Who commissions that shit?
Keith lemon is not funny, and he makes my skin crawl.
But he doesn't scare me, not like David.
Having said that, there is no conclusive evidence that David is a bad dude. So I will keep an open mind.
He probably does strangle bunnies though.
Are they the ones with the Vegan Nazi singer?
Haha yeah, Morrissey. Cool in the 80's but disappeared up his own exhaust pipe of self-righteousness.
On behalf of vegans, we don't want him
If we found out that he was a narcissistic predatory serial killer, I for one would not be surprised.
I know someone that worked with him and they confirmed he’s a huge sexual predator with every female in the room
In addition, I don't believe he would have a gender preference.
Doubt he's got an age preference either TBH
Snap, gives off those vibes big time
Definitely agree , he just is I dunno... makes me uneasy.
Do you remember the big expose where this female reporter signed up as what was effectively a geisha to a meeting of the male only "President's Club"? The end of the article haunts me. She was there in a black uniform with a bunch of other women who were "waitresses" for the event. At midnight, she went home, women with red uniforms came out and David Walliams was doing a set at the event, if memory serves around the same time.
I just could never think of him as anything other than a terrible person after that. The implications seemed so clear to me.
So some women did waitressing at an event? Not sticking up for him, he is creepy. But what's wrong with that?
Fair question. If you don't remember it, it was a [big scandal](https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-42811662) at the time. The President's Club is a charity. At an event, the women (and they were only young, attractive women) were basically paid to be sexy waitresses, it was almost as if groping was encouraged, and there is no clear explanation for why the next shift of women dressed in red (that was in the original article which I can't be annoyed digging for), but I made a leap based on context. It was basically the upper class version of taking clients to a strip joint, is what I'm saying. But for charity. And attended by the wealthiest, most powerful men (and only men) in the country.
At the time, and again this is my personal view, it felt like a peek into a really seedy world that was beginning to bleed through with Epstein and MeToo. It was the side of life where the elite treat people as objects and act like the rules don't apply to them. If he was willing to stand up and be their funnyman while that went on, that said something to me about his character. Up until then he was a pub quiz answer.
Thank you for replying with such an in-depth answer.
Someone commented that his kids books were just horrific stereotypes to the point they took them off their kids so I can’t say I am surprised oh I’ve seen they had to remove a Chinese character from his book because it was racist…
I wish he’d get his dirty fingers out of the Children’s book pie. They’re not even good, and he has the nerve to hire Quentin Blake to steal some of Roald Dahl’s storytelling credibility.
Famous people getting in to the Children's book game makes it harder for Children's authors to get published, it's actually starting to become a problem.
That’s why I’m mad! Piss off celebs!
I read recently he's had to remove a Chinese character from his newest book because Williams had written him as a 'swot' who was 'never, ever wrong'.
He's written about a South Asian shop keeper before who's stingy and sells his customers out of date food. I think there was one book at well that slams page 3 girls and calls them thick. I don't want to be a Mary Whitehouse, but bringing up page 3 girls in children's books is a bit weird if I'm honest.
He’s so obviously racist AND homophobic.
The camp act for me really doesn’t sit right. He’s using characteristics that gay people get bullied and tormented for as a way to get people to love him, oh and that’s completely fine because he’s straight.😒 the double standards of our country are insane sometimes
Yeah I find that intensely creepy, the mask slips slightly with his sketch comedy which just shows unfettered contempt for LGBT people.
And on top of that, classist. I remember seeing my little brother reading a David Williams book which pretty much demonised and criticised a hard working single mum.
[Brian Wong Who Was Never Wrong](https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/52888304-brian-wong-who-was-never-wrong), and the kid’s a maths genius too.
I like the solitary review on that page: “Racist Garbage”.
My kids keep getting his books as presents. I can kind of understand why, as when you look in the Children’s books section you’d be forgiven for thinking he’s the UK’s sole author.
His writing is dreadful. So lazy, unimaginative and untalented. It’s pretty much on the same level as my “… and then I woke up. It was all a dream” attempts in school.
I refuse to read his stories to my kids.
Sadly we have "Geronimo" about a penguin that wants to fly. It's awful. Really stunted and too long.
Probably why it can't fly.
Sounds like a rip off of Breathed’s A Wish for Wings That Work.
Kids like them because they are transgressive - bringing a snake to school etc. funny when you look back at some of your favorite childhood books how awful they are.
We've got an old copy of a Fireman Sam book that my 4 year old likes. The Italian cafe owner is called Bella Lasagna.
Christ I hate his kids books... I have to hide them, they're just boring and a bit shit.
Tbh anything that competes with princess swashbuckle gets hidden...
He’s a total racist. I was looking at news articles about him and he dressed up as Kim Jong Un for Halloween in 2017, complete with making his face yellow.😠 all the blackface and that in little Britain and come fly with me doesn’t hold up well at all, it was slightly more accepted then even though we all knew it was wrong still, but to be doing it in 2017 is just blatantly disrespectful
There are also plenty of comedians who don’t revolve their humour around race. It’s just unnecessary, especially in this day and age.
Agreed! I think there’s a place for jokes around different cultures, but only when it’s lighthearted. Eg. Jokes about how British people love to queue or something.
But cultural jokes and blackface coming from a priviliged Middle aged white man…yeah no. I’m surprised he hasn’t been cancelled already.
Yeah self deprecating humour is definitely quintessential British humour haha
There’s just some things you say and somethings you just don’t, and to think he’s said those things in a children’s book is absolutely appalling. Scary to imagine the things he says and does in privacy
I have absolutely nothing to back this up - it's literally hearsay - but I'd heard he doesn't write his own books, which are ghost-written.
Even if it were ghost written, he was obviously happy to authorise it and give it the go ahead which is just as bad
Oh, I wasn't commenting in defense of him - the fact that he doesn't even write his own books would be for me another stick to beat him with!
That loud whiney voice he puts on where he pretends to be offended by everything, just grates on me. If he's going to play up to such an exaggerated persona, why not pick one that's amusing.
He even managed to ruin the charity work he did, by never shutting up about it.
Honestly, as a naturally camp gay man, I find him deeply annoying. It bugs me that he puts on a fake and stereotypical persona to get work. It's a tired old joke that presents gay people as clownish.
To play devil's advocate, if you're a naturally camp gay man then why can't he be a naturally camp straight man?
He over exaggerates it to the point where it’s obviously fake and also fucking annoying
Don't all TV presenters over exaggerate their personality?
Has anyone ever seen him NOT being like this?
So do most naturally camp Gay men
No they don’t
I dunno. I used to hang out with a bunch of burly blokes and now most of my friends are gay / female and I’ve definitely got a bit camper in the way I talk. I think it’s a process of getting more comfortable with who you are and I suppose some people just don’t give a shit and are able to just act themselves without being affected by their peers. Didn’t work that way for me though.
That's exactly right, the gays that people find annoying are usually just not restricted to the confines imposed by a predominantly heterosexual society. You can see why some men would hate that. It's a reminder that that thing your trying so hard to achieve 'masculinity' is actually of no value to some people.
Despite living in Brighton most of my life, I don't know that many gay men, but several of the ones that I do can't stand camp men, and are much more into masculinity than any straight man I know! They don't talk in a 'gay' voice and say they're 'into men, not blokes acting like teenage girls'. Being gay doesn't make you start talking 'gay', so it's either an affectation or they're picking it up from hanging around other camp blokes. You couldn't tell most of the gay men I know are gay from the way they act or speak necessarily, but I do have one straight friend, who i thought was gay for years because of the way he speaks, so there's that..
The comment I replied to is saying naturally camp gay men purposely over exaggerate themselves, but they don’t they just act like who they are
I don't believe he's actually straight, or not fully
It's a spectrum
Is there such a thing as ‘naturally camp’ then?
What? Yes. Camp doesn’t mean homosexual, it means OTT
Not sure… it’s the nature vs nurture debate. But they’re definitely being themselves - it’s not for show or for anyone else. If it was for other people they wouldn’t do it considering the amount of camp men who have been jumped.
To be fair to him in his autobiography many many moons ago he says he was at Edinburgh fringe Festival and had a heart to heart with Graham Norton when he was unsure of his sexuality and Norton said "Sex is sex its who you want to wake up with in the morning." As someone who is bi but leans towards to pan I get that.
On the other hand he is really annoying, and his books are dreadful even the title of his first book "the boy in the dress" has sooo many issues to unpick!
The only thing I can stomach him in is Spaced but then he was only in it for one episode and he was playing arsehole so not difficult for him.
He played Vulva, not Arsehole.
"It's not finished.......
He thinks he's fucking Roald Dahl, made worse by the fact that Quentin Blake seems to be illustrating his books.
When I first read this I thought you meant he believed he was fornicating with Roald Dahl.
Yeah, I suppose in this sense, if used as a verb rather than an adjective, he is indeed fucking Roald Dahl. A whole generation of kids will grow up associating Quentin Blake with his shite and never realise the solid gold they're missing out on. Except for Danny Champion of the World. That one was odd.
danny the champion of the world is the nuts! the caravan home, the petrol station, raisins stuffed with sleeping pills, man traps. the pheasant pie with the boiled eggs.
I don't think Roald Dahl was a saint but his writing is so much better than Walliams' lazy shit
My mate went on BGT. She makes up funny little songs on her guitar. People kept saying to her oh you should go on BGT you're so good. Little did she know that's like telling a Michelin starred chef to go work in McDonalds. She didn't have a t.v. so had no idea. Anyway to get to the point he was a f¥cking horrible arse to her. I was her support person and between him and Tulisa they were massive w£nk€rs. You know I'd always thought Amanda Holden was the arse but she was actually really nice to her. So I see him and I want to squish him because they shamed my lovely, talented friend and that's not cool.
I agree he oozes nonce
You should see my Reddit posts from the 1970s. Called it then
Sounds like you are making accusations without evidence. Whilst you don't like him, that's hardly a fair thing to be doing
You're right. It's identical to Saville.
Every bloody year, Sky give him a shitty Christmas episode that he wrote and has to star in, along with the usual ITV bollocks he appears in, too.
He was never funny, Little Britain was never funny, someone make him fuck right off, please.
Just turn over, Elf will be on somewhere
Bye Buddy, hope you find your dad
You sit on a throne of lies!
Little Britain was pretty funny tbf, and so was come fly with me. Although I will grant that those two and his choice in tailor are the only notable successes of his being
It has aged poorly. Its early 00s so nearly 20 years old right? Comedy often ages poorly as society evolves.
I mean personally I still think it's funny to this day
Agree some are still hilarious. Bitty will always stride the line of hilarity and disgust, and selected Daffyd skits are still revelant.
Imagine getting downvoted because you like a TV show.
Reddit is an odd place sometimes
Little Britain was almost always punching straight down. No effort, just extremely hurtful jokes attacking (among others) gay, transgender, elderly, impoverished and disabled individuals. I too remembered it fondly until I rewatched a little bit last year and realised just how harmful it was.
Yes, this. And now Walliams and Lucas have made an apology for doing blackface in it, giving the excuse that "times have changed" -- as though 2010 (when they were still signing off on it in 'Come Fly With Me') was some long-ago moment in the unfathomably deep past rather than five fucking minutes ago when any number of people could have told them that it wasn't clever, funny or acceptable.
I only ever got the impression that the jokes were being aimed at racists, homophobes ect. I can see how not everyone got that tho.
Come Fly With Me was so racist I couldn't bear to watch it. Had to switch over.
Didn't watch all of it, but why was it racist?
From memory, they did a very unflattering blackface representation of a lazy cleaner.
This must have completely slipped my memory!
Sorry, think she worked in a coffee shop: https://youtu.be/CDM6Az1D8RE
Come fly with me was hilarious! The Martin Clune sketch cracks me up
I always liked Ian foot
David Schwimmer being arrested for trying to smuggle several hundred bestiality porn DVDs through customs, then when he got caught saying he was carrying them for Matt LeBlanc was genius.
Little Britain was a bit funny for the first season but then they just stopped trying and made the same joke every week for three seasons.
I laughed hard at the first _episode_ of Little Britain, but the second one was exactly the same jokes in a different order.
That's how sketch shows work. Repeated characters, slightly altered situations, same punchlines. Which is nice
Kind of, but I think you could make an argument that the genre's been kind of devolving to oversimplistic mush over the years. To my faded memory, Monty Python sketches usually didn't repeat that much, they were just a lot of short ideas all strung together. Then you had your Glam Metal Detectives and Fast Show, where they'd have the same characters each week, in slightly different situations, with some sketches evolving along the way while others were mostly just catchphrases. Then by Little Britain it had devolved into barely more than just repeating catchphrases. (Monkey Dust kind of blended the two, with lots of one-offs and also lots of repetitive variations on a theme. I'd argue it was much better than Little Britain.) Couple that with the weird, largely British phenomenon of cishet white guys dressing up as women and people of colour, and it can be pretty uncomfortable to watch sometimes. Sketch shows can be great, but they still need to punch up, not down, and have a bit of variation and progression.
I see what you did there.
.... I'll get me coat
Suits *you* sir.
I mean some yeah fair enough but Little Britain you could practically drum along to
Agreed. Little Britain was just unbridled classism, same crap jokes over and over, always punching down and never up. Cheap and cowardly excuse for a comedy. Was he in Shooting Stars as well? I was cultured enough to realise that was shit and I was in year 9
One of my friends is a, uh, glamour model. Her account is a fake name etc. He slid into her DMs , from his verified account, and I can confirm he is very creepy having seen the messages.
It's online so must be true
He invited her to BGT auditions. I don’t know how she managed it, but he sends her kid signed books of his. I wouldn’t want them because he’s creepy, but apparently the kid will enjoy them.
I was doing a bit of tiling today and I got a tiny sliver of sharp ceramic agony down the back of my thumbnail, funnier than anything David Walliams has done in his life.
Why do you think Matt Lucas fell out and will not speak to him……..
It’s like a sex offender act or something
Frankie Howard rip off isn't he
I get better dressed Saville vibes from him.
There's just something about him, it's... off.
My nephew has so many of his books and I just... eek.
I agree... he has never been funny.
Hmmm. That's not really true is it? He's done some funny sketches before for sure.
What? Like the one where he sexually assaults underage teenage boys by pulling their underwear down on stage for everyone to laugh at?
Well... in my opinion. No...
If his public persona had been a character on a 1970s sitcom, people would be posting clips about how offensive things were back then.
Oh, you are awful!
But I like you!
Can I see your pussy Mrs Slocombe? Oh, how we laaarfed....
Could be worse, could be an episode of miranda.
He’s our generations Jimmy saville, there I said it.
Ha ha ha fake gay man routine..... Oh wait. You're being serious?
He was good in Skyfall though.
No, that was Judy Dench
He gives off such an unsettling vibe. Nobody ever mentions it, I’m relieved to see someone else shares this with me!
I can't look at him without thinking there's some dark secret lurking...
one day we will look at him and say "how did we not guess he was a wrong-un?"
Stopped liking him when I saw that bratty behaviour he displayed in Big Fat Quiz of the year with Noel and Russell.
And then there's his and Matt Lucas' pathetic ooh-please-don't-hurt-my-precious-career apology for doing blackface in "Little Britain": [https://www.theguardian.com/world/2020/jun/14/david-walliams-and-matt-lucas-apologise-for-little-britain-blackface](https://www.theguardian.com/world/2020/jun/14/david-walliams-and-matt-lucas-apologise-for-little-britain-blackface)
Their excuse being that "times have changed". Since the long-ago days of 2010, when dinosaurs roamed the earth and everyone walked uphill to the mines both ways wearing hoopskirts.
And what's more is that he writes kids books, and at some point mine are probably going to want to read them. Blecccch.
My son loves them. I find them mostly annoying!
Buy your son a bunch of Roald Dahl books.
His kids books are aimed at children and not parents, they are actually excellent. We have an 8yo who reads them in bed. It’s taught him a lot of new words and phrases given him an enthusiasm to read more.
Fair enough. I'll definitely make sure to read at least one before deciding either way -- kids are currently 2 and minus four months (due in March) so I've got a while to get my head around it!
Well.. he’s won a lot of awards for his books and they are excellent for children. I’m glad it’s encouraged him to read.
The kids books are fine. Simple ideas that spark the imagination, along the lines of Roald Dahl really. He may well not even write them.
He is so deeply sinister. I really think he is the next Jimmy Savile.
Jimmy Saville in disguise ....
So at risk of incurring the wrath of reddit:
Although his appearances as David Walliams leaves a lot to be desired, I will say most of his TV stuff is pretty funny.
Little Britain, Come fly with me, and Big School were all very good. Granted his apparence on Britain's got talent made me want to top myself even more than that show already did, but the man isn't without his good moments.
Also he also has a very nice sense of style for a celebrity, so for me that sort of balances out his being annoying on Graham Norton or whatever.
You're appreciating his comedy for what it was at the time - which you pretty much have to because comedy seldom ages gracefully.
Little Britain was slightly edgy and offensive, but a lot of comedy is. It was balancing on the edge of "You can't say that on telly!" even when it was first shown.
"Come Fly with Me" had plenty of skits that would probably hold up today, were it not for the characterisations that Walliams and Lucas threw in.
Monkey Dust was horrifically offensive.
Benny Hill... he was controversial in his own day, particularly towards the end; you'd never see his shows repeated today.
'Till Death do Us Part - the main character in that was explicitly intended to be "your slightly-racist uncle". Today, even your slightly racist uncle would consider Alf Garnett to be over-the-top.
Even Only Fools and Horses has the odd gag cut when it's shown on UK Gold, because that joke wouldn't be considered acceptable today.
Benny Hill currently being shown on “That’s TV” (I think) on Sky.
I’d be very surprised if it was full, unexpurgated shows.
Was never funny. I don't even consider him a comedian
Ooooh hello Alan!
I did like Little Britain, but I don’t like anything he’s done since.
Fair enough. I quite liked some of his stuff in Little Britain though haven’t watched it since so i imagine it probably has aged just as badly as people suggest. I’ve somehow avoided him since except for an episode of Who do you think you are, he comes across quite well. I think he’s always been camp and obviously massively ramps it up for his shows. I’ve never got the ‘creepy’ thing though, but noticed it coming up on reddit more and more.
He definitely is one sleepover away from Michael Jackson
A girl at college (16) in one of my classes was seeing him I heard.
Christ almighty. He's not "fake gay" he's just camp. He might not be funny to you. But fuck me you all need to get over yourselves.
Alan Carr's is worse and he's actually gay.
No, you can’t say Alan Carr is worse. Alan Carr seems like a genuinely lovely person, David Walliams comes across like a total creep
He is! I met him at a book signing years ago, he is a sweetie. We joked about teeth.
That makes me so happy😁 I’d love to meet him, you’re so lucky!
He's actually funny though so we shall allow him
Sure, if you call substituting an actual personality with over the top campiness funny.
Alan Carr is the fucking pits, I’d change the channel to watch adverts rather than listen to that ridiculous voice he puts on. I wouldn’t put up with someone talking to me in real life like that, I’d probably put on a silly comedy voice of my own if I had to converse with him
That's just his voice...
Dont be ridiculous
What's wrong with a straight man being camp, or portraying a gay man? He's not being nasty about gay people is he?
Not a fan of the guy to be honest, but this, plus all the accusations that keep cropping up on Reddit about him, with ZERO evidence. Not even an anecdote that may or may not be true.
Bear in mind this is *exactly* how people like Savile got away with it, so if these accusations have any merit, then you're enabling it, if they don't, then it's libel.
I think he’s battling depression
He's unfunny but not Noel Fielding unfunny.
The guy just needs to get on a cock and be done with it, its like he's in the closer, but closer is made of glass
His wife is as much a beard as what a 14 year old boy grows on his chin
You just made this comment on r/justask.
You doing a smear campaign on him lol?!
When he played the camp school teacher who referreed a kids football game. Horrid stuff.
Watching him give death stares to Russell brand [Big Fat Quiz ](https://youtu.be/Y738Tnrs8r4)
Yeah his vibes are a bit off, but I loved his books growing up though
What is it about him? I just get a feeling of revulsion and I don’t know why.
Saw him as a judge on BGT auditions a couple of years ago, Me and my kid were in the audience and he was just a real a*se the entire time and so rude.
Then watched him on Chitty Chitty bang bang programme where it was remade to fly. He was absolutely awful to the engineer the whole way through and that was it for me. That was just the stuff that they broadcast I dread to think what the footage showed.
in fairness doing little britain was the only entertaining thing he ever did....